Category Archives: Elderly Emotions

Scams

shutterstock_29038231Seniors are a target demographic for scammers looking to pad their pocketbooks with your hard earned retirement with promises of immense wealth and human aid.  Sometimes these scammers are asking for assistance, offering you inheritance or just want you to open a link so they can implant a virus in your computer in order to try and capture your financial information without your knowledge.

Legitimate Emails

Legitimate emails are from people or companies you actually signed up for. With emails from companies, there is an option, usually at the bottom of the email body, which allows you to unsubscribe.  You may or may not have signed up for these emails, they give you the opt-out options so you may be taken off the list.  A legitimate company wants you to be interested what they send and if you’re not, they are fine with removing you off their list.  Those companies spend time and a lot of money to send these out and if you’re not buying or interested, they would rather not waste your time.

Spam Emails

Defined as: irrelevant or inappropriate messages sent on the Internet to a large number of recipients. Spam emails are often scams or solicitations and can be very annoying.

Things to look for in spam emails:

  • Links (don’t click on these links unless you requested information from the sender)
  • Requesting Log In (verify that the company is requesting this information easily by seeing if your personal information is on the email such as your name ie an email from eBay or Paypal will be labelled Dear Your Name)
  • Incorrect sender email address (if the name is correct but the domain name of the receipt is wrong, it’s a scam ie an email from Paypal Customer Service will be from @paypal.com)
  • Incorrect grammar or spelling

Spam Tactics:

  • Fear (they use fear to get you to click a link)
  • Inheritance (if you don’t know your rich Great Uncle Pete, he probably doesn’t exist and if he did why would his lawyer contact you via email)
  • Reputation (as you’ll see below in example 1, they use fear about your reputation to get you to click a link)
  • New exciting product (new things can be fabulous, but not necessary)
  • Ticket or Court (threatening with legal action can be scary however it’s fake, a court or city will never email you about getting a ticket)
  • Health Care or Insurance (often scammers will try to scare information from you by using fear of cancelling your insurance or changing your coverage)

Viruses

Running a regular virus scan will be helpful.  Every website you go to gathers certain information from your computer, which might be as simple as location information or what you browse.  Some sites may leave information on your computer which can be very damaging.  Some highly recommended scans you should run: CCleaner, Malwarebytes’ and Super Anti-Spyware. These programs are free, as long as you choose the free option, you can purchase the upgraded versions but the free version is sufficient enough to do the job. Run these weekly if you use your computer often or monthly if you use it only occasionally. Mind you these scans may find more than just Viruses, like cookies (a packet of data sent by an Internet server to a browser, which is returned by the browser each time it subsequently accesses the same server, used to identify the user or track their access to the server), these may or may not be dangerous. So don’t be alarmed if when you scan the number of threats detected are high, this may be normal based on what you do while you are browsing.

Another way to protect yourself, turn off your computer while not in use and unplug the internet connection while not in use.  This limits what can be done to your computer while you’re not using it.

Having more than one email can be helpful. One email I use for communication with people I know and check often, the other email is used to receive communication from companies that I have to sign up for or purchase something from.  This keeps my email that I check often fairly spam free and the other email can be bombarded with spam.

Sending Information

Sometimes it happens that you have to send over information. I dread doing this but it’s necessary in some cases.  You can try to avoid it by calling the companies or individuals and giving the information over the phone.  Information given via email can be intercepted.

What information is safe to give someone online:

  • Name
  • Birth Month
  • Things You Are Interested In
  • General Area you live or visit

What information you shouldn’t give to someone online:

  • Full Birthday (of you or anyone you care about)
  • Address (of you or anyone you care about)
  • Phone Number (of anyone you care about)
  • Mother’s Maiden Name
  • Children or Grandchildren’s Names
  • Social Security Number
  • ANY FINANCIAL INFORMATION

Do not send anyone any money and verify all requests for money even from family.

True Example:

Dan (false name) is one of our office staff, his grandmother received a phone call from a person who stated they were Dan traveling Europe and needed a thousand dollars. Dan’s grandmother was smart and told the person to call back in a few minutes.  During this time Dan’s grandmother called Dan’s cell phone and verified the person who called was not Dan.  The person never called back.  With an extra step Dan’s grandmother’s money is safe in her bank account.

Checks and Money Orders

It is common to receive a check or money order as a scam and the person who sent the check or money requests a refund of a certain amount of money and the remainder is yours to keep for doing leg work.  Sounds great if the original check or money order was valid.  Usually there is a sense of urgency to wire the funds over because it might take 5-60 days to realize the check or money order was fake or fraudulent.

Scam Email Examples

These were received at our office, please do not click on any of the links, these are used just as an example.

EXAMPLE 1:

Based on our preliminary findings your online reputation could be under scrutiny.

Did you know this is being posted about you online?

———————————————–

File Lookup: 8759372

Analysis ||

http://www.magwok.com/signification/salacity/gloriam/W5Vm4BJn5LxUl6TvtRLO6dP

I1drE8sMEpMAzGFebxf4=/overhearing.html

When negative things are being published about your reputation, it impacts everything you value.

As you can see they use scare tactics to get you to click a link.

 

EXAMPLE 2:

 Hello,

Wayne Walter & Associate Chambers is conducting a standard process investigation on behalf of Allianz UK, and we  would like you to assist with this independent inquiry.

My name is Wayne Walter. I am a Private Investigator and also a reunion counselor/analyst. This investigation and inquiry involves my client, who shares the same last name with you and also the circumstances surrounding the investments/ life insurance policy he  made with Allianz UK prior to his untimely death.

My client and his wife and only daughter daugther died in an auto accident and no successor in title over the investments made here in London. The essence of this communication with you is to present you as the heir/next of kin to the deceased so that the isured amount GBP 7,500,000 {Seven Million Five Hundred Thousand Great Britain Pounds} with Allianz UK can be paid to you as the you as the successor hence I cannot find any of the relatives of the deceased.

Allianz UK has given me an ultimatum as his lawyer to present the next of kin within 14 days otherwise his assets will be moved to the government treasury. I want us to utilize this opportunity hence I have tried to locate any of the relatives but to no avail. I will provide all relevant legal documents to facilitate the transfer of the money to you and all I need is your full cooperation. If you are interested in this business, please let me know immediately so that I can give you more information as to how this business will be completed.  Kindly send the following information if you are interested in this transaction:

1.       Your full name

2.       Contact address

3.       Contact telephone and mobile numbers

4.       Age and occupation.

I look forward to your reply.

Wayne Walter.

Principal Partner, Wayne Walter & Associate Chambers.

Tel. +44 702 404 6984

As you can see they are requesting information, the sender is foreign, grammar is bad.

 

EXAMPLE 3:

 

Dutch Glow – Amish Wood Milk…100 Year Old Formula

– Research Promo Center 700 N Valley St Suite B Anaheim CA 92801 — Unsubscribe by going to the following web address: http://surveys-digital.net/d056MuDxeYpOdu7ZO+anEy9nSwICMyWKlp25D+RfsqMw/1LoI15ii7yQZEOMR2PV9KhfETj5wpCxdfOA/hAqpfQh3GLt+WPLYH+D3qhIzB90Q8Hrv5Vi5e3tZ2BAMpOw/8wLBUCu4nM6eQ==

“It’s time you saw where you stand, Joe Lanier. Look at this girl. Iangry apologies he was backing out of the door. But Joe caught his arm.rejoined, “What a damned shame it you were his wife.”don’t, I’ll go right out of my mind!” But what? She stared about her,from now? How much shall I mean to my husband–and to other men andShe stopped for a moment by the table, with the letter in her hand, andhim down.”draw it on a large scale, and he set out to do so. But his hand washostess.how blind and ignorant she was–to make her see the difference.impassioned and intense and bold in his conceptions. There was a”I haven’t been feeling very strong, Joe,” she said in an unnatural”Why is it?” she demanded.free. I even tried to earn my living. I worked for a while. But thealways they stayed until Joe came home; and in his manner, with dismay,”Where are we going this evening?” http://surveys-digital.net/d056MuDxeYpOdu7ZO+anEy9nSwICMyWKlp25D+RfsqMw/1LoI15ii7yQZEOMR2PV9KhfETj5wpCxdfOA/hAqpfQh3GLt+WPLYH+D3qhIzB90Q8Hrv5Vi5e3tZ2BAMpOw/8wLBUCu4nM6eQ==

As you can see grammar is terrible, the bottom information doesn’t match the top, they are part of the same email but are about two completely different things.

 

Let’s plan to keep your retirement, savings and what not where they should stay, in your accounts and not in those who didn’t work as hard as you did to make that money!

 

Top 10 Scams Targeting Seniors

http://www.ncoa.org/enhance-economic-security/economic-security-Initiative/savvy-saving-seniors/top-10-scams-targeting.html

Fraud: 6 scams aimed at the elderly

http://www.bankrate.com/finance/retirement/fraud-5-scams-aimed-at-the-elderly-1.aspx

Fraud Target: Senior Citizens

http://www.fbi.gov/scams-safety/fraud/seniors

Written by Valerie Michel Buck

Senior Online Dating

Image courtesy of Ambro at FreeDigitalPhotos.net

Image courtesy of Ambro at FreeDigitalPhotos.net

As time moves on invitations from family members continue to pour in, spending time with the grand & great-grandchildren are wonderful, however there is a loneliness they cannot always fill. As a person gets older and more mature, dating seems less like finding a physical attraction and more like finding a well-rounded person who can fulfill many different needs. Whether your last marriage ended due to death or divorce, being elderly doesn’t mean you have to be alone.

First question you should ask yourself is, are you ready to date? Can you handle emotionally and financially what dating may or may not have to offer?  Dating can be stressful and of course at times it seems as if you’re the only fish in the sea and the rest of the people are algae.  Trying to find someone can make you feel more alone than when you started the journey.

Not much has changed in the way of dating, however meeting people to get to the actual date is drastically different. There are many social media sites that people can meet, online dating is specifically targeted to those who are looking for a relationship. Online dating sites have recently realized that targeting demographics is the way to spark new interest in their services, there are dating sites for farmers, ethnic races, geographic areas and of course seniors.

A list of a few of the more popular senior dating sites:

  • ourtime.com
  • seniorpeoplemeet.com
  • eharmony.com/senior-dating
  • dating.aarp.org

And of course if you are already on a dating site, you can limit the age ranges of the people you are looking for to include only seniors, it’s not necessary to change sites and have to write your profile all over again.  Remember that sites like Craigslist are not dating sites, these are general post sites, which means you could be getting more or less than you bargained for.

Notifying your family and close friends about your intentions may be stressful or to them may be a relief, you may also get one of the more tech savvy grandkids to help you with your profile.  Talking to people you care about is a necessary step, sharing with people who care about you also acts as a safety feature.  Remember that you care about them, so keeping them in the loop helps you both.

Beginner in online dating? First thing first, set up your profile and figure out what you want. This is mandatory on most sites, so if you are unsure about what you are looking for, take a day or two and figure out the attributes of the person you would like to have in your life down to hair color, age and even whether they are a smoker or not.  If you don’t specify what you want you will get a larger list of people to look at, some of the fields are required but specify so, and of course if you change your mind later, you may always change these details.  Also give thought to what you want people to know about you.  Remember to keep personal details and sensitive information about yourself off your profile, to avoid any possible scams or issues later.

What information is safe to give someone online:

  • Name
  • Birth Month
  • Things You Are Interested In
  • General Area you live or visit
  • How many children or grandchildren you have
  • General Hobbies (don’t specify where and when)
  • Culture and religion
  • Phone Number (when you start to get better acquainted)

What information you shouldn’t give to someone online:

  • Full Birthday (of you or anyone you care about)
  • Address (of you or anyone you care about)
  • Phone Number (of anyone you care about)
  • Mother’s Maiden Name
  • Children or Grandchildren’s Names
  • Social Security Number

Now that you’re a little more comfortable with the idea of dating and your family is too, think about the future.  Are you looking for a life partner?  Are you willing to relocate and what does that mean for your family?  These will all be questions you will come across sometime in the dating process.

Kathy Damer from a Blog Resource for Senior Dating says, “Take it slow. Be patient about meeting someone. If they are genuine they will have similar concerns about you being genuine too.  If the person is pushy about meeting you too soon this is not a good sign. Move on, even if you’re developing feelings. Easier to cut loose now than when it’s too late.”  You can find all of Kathy’s advice at www.senior-dating.org

Online dating is filled with difficult way to decipher how someone feels about you by adding things such as winks, this is an easy way to say to another person that you are interested them without any pressure or commitment and of course no obligation to message you or wink back at you.

Always remember that you’re not the only person who might be learning to online date, so if someone doesn’t get back to you or it takes them a while to get back to you, don’t take it personal. They may not be interested, didn’t notice your message or wink, have little internet access, are shy, or generally don’t know what they are doing.

Messaging another person.  Remember to take it slow, ask them about their additional interests other than what is said on their profile, of course read their profile first.  If you agree to meet in person, remember to find a safe public location.  Always notify someone you are close to as to where you are going.  If you have a cell phone, remember to bring it with you just in case.

Meeting in person.  It’s so exciting when you finally meet someone in person.  Beware that a profile is often the reflection of what a person wants to be rather than who they really are (or what the writer thinks the person is), meeting them in person will help you discover that inner self.  Remember to keep an open mind and that you’re discovering more about this person every time you interact with them. Maybe jot down some notes about things to talk about and questions to ask.  The more you date the easier it will become, especially if you’ve been out of the scene for a while.

Deciding to Stop Communicating. Remember the golden rule, do unto others.  If you decide that you no longer want to communicate with a person, for whatever reason (discovering you aren’t ready to date, just don’t see eye to eye with them, found the love of your life, etc), remember to be respectful and tell them that you no longer wish to communicate so they aren’t wondering what happened to you.  If you decide to give a brief reason why, remember to make it brief, giving too many details may confuse the situation.  Remember that’s it’s okay to not like someone or just want to be their friend.  Understand that this may happen to you as well.  Things don’t always work out with everyone all the time but when it does the magic is worth all the heart ache.

Falling in love. Remember to talk to a lawyer before you pop the question.  Remember that when you get married your estate doesn’t necessarily get inherited by your spouse and your children’s inheritance isn’t always secure.  Don’t take any of this for granted.  You can find a lawyer in your state on our website: http://www.longtermcarelink.net/a2cfindattorney.htm or http://www.longtermcarelink.net/a7estateplanning.htm

I hope you find these tips make it easier to figure out how the online dating world works and of course, best of luck to you in your endeavors.

Written by Valerie Michel Buck

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